Things I’ve bought lately, I guess

1)  I switched over all my makeup to Almay.  Why?  Because I have had a recurring “dry-peeling” skin issue under my eyes for, like, six months now.  I’ve even gone to the doctor for it.  This is the second time I’ve switched over all my makeup, and frankly, this time it wasn’t secretly fun anymore.  It was just annoying.  Anyway, I bought all Almay makeup because I read about how good it is for sensitive skin and skin allergies (which I might have I guess).  So far, I have perceived no difference in the quality of skin under my eyes.  However!  I have perceived a difference in how pretty I look.  Almay makeup is, like, really awesome.  So that’s a bonus.

1a)  Oooh sciencey:  I bought Smart Shade makeup.  Has anyone tried it?  I have!  It blows my mind, I think.  It comes out white with grey dots and then it blends perfectly on my skin.  How do they do that???  Also, I finally got wise to the fact that my skin is “light.”  For some reason I always doubt myself in the drugstore, and buy makeup a shade or two too dark. 

2)  I am loving cracking my knuckles right now.

3)  Things from Trader Joe’s I can’t live without anymore:  Space balls (I don’t know what they’re called but they have spaceships and aliens on the bag), tomato soup of course, and these mocha yogurt things for breakfast.  MOCHA YOGURT!!  Yes.  And the Space Balls are these puffy rice snacks with sesame oil and seaweed that are soooooo good.  There is nothing else like them.  They are perfect snacks.

4)  Wayne and I are going to see Casablanca at the Music Box on Valentine’s Day!!!  Yay, right?  There’s also going to be a sweetheart sing-along.  I’m scared of that, but interested. 

5)  I bought a bunch of bars for work because they are portable, and delicious, and after I eat them I’m not hungry anymore.  But let me tell you something.  Although Lara Bars seem like the right choice because they have cute, girly packaging and are uniform in size and shape and have homey-sounding flavors like “cherry pie,” they have nothing, nothing on Cliff Bars.  Cliff Bars are where it’s AT.  I mean, Lara bars only have 4 grams of protein.  That’s for babies. 

6)  Lately, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about cosmetic allergies and groceries.  Can you tell?

Snowstorm Thursday

My favorite thing about snowstorms is watching everybody come into work in the morning.  Every. Single. Person. is red-faced, covered in snow (although I happen to know they walked through a large lobby and up 33 floors on an elevator) with a look on their face like they’ve just been through something profound.  Everybody says, “I made it!”  Like, literally, every person.  And I don’t blame them.  That’s the exact thing I said when I emerged, red-faced and snowy from the elevator 20 minutes ago.  Plus everybody is mismatched.  That’s the second best thing about snowstorms.  It’s like people know there’s snow and they lose all sense of what things in their closet match other things.  They just run around their house grabbing hats, boots, gloves willy-nilly.  No time to mess with color!  There’s a snowstorm!  People are out of breath when they get here; they’ve got one pant leg tucked into their boot, the other over the boot.  It’s delightful.  “I made it!”

It’s really hard out there.  Like, really really. 

I also love the signs that say, “Watch out!  Falling ice!”  They’re similar to the signs on the side of the road by, like, cliffs and stuff.  There’s scary pictures of icicles.  I have no idea what you can do to avoid falling ice, except try to look up, but then you will just get impaled by falling ice on your face.  You also might have some trouble dodging people, bikes, cars, taxi’s, and busses.  Actually, it’s kind of a dreamy image though, of me walking around the city with my head tilted up like a character in a Chagall painting.

Anyway, for a reluctant city girl like myself it’s truly interesting to watch people deal with nature.  People don’t normally deal with nature in the Loop.  Seriously.  Like, once I saw three cops and a squad car dealing with a possum.

Lady Cop:  (laughing, looking at me)  Never seen anything like this before.

Me:  What’s going on?

Lady Cop:  Possum.

Me:  A possum?  In there?  Is there something wrong with it?

Lady Cop:  I don’t know.  Probably.  It’s an animal. 

She had her hand on her gun and was carefully watching an overturned crate.  There was another Mr. Cop nearby on a walkie talkie and another pulling up the squad car.  The Lady who was talking to me also confirmed that she actually had no idea what kind of animal it was; she was just guessing possum.  “Possum, Opossum, Raccoon– I don’t know, I just know it shouldn’t be here.”  Then she shouted, “How are we going to get this thing in the car?!” to the guy on the walkie talkie, who shook his head and smiled like, “Do you think I know the answer to that?”  A delightful day to watch the police in action.

I hate living in the city, everybody knows that.  I don’t trust places without a horizon, and where the sky isn’t the biggest thing around.  I have to hang out on the third floor of the Target Parking Garage to see it sometimes.  Oh, I know I know.  I love the city… I mean, I love the people here and I love my life.  But my soul gets moldy because there isn’t enough space for it to breathe so whenever I’m reminded that there are still forces bigger than buildings and elevated trains and miles upon miles of sidewalk with tiny, stunted trees caged in rows, I’m glad.

Today I’m glad because no matter what technology you’re wearing on your feet (I myself prefer snowboots), no matter if you took a train or drove, no matter if you work out or not, no matter if you’re rich, poor, fat, skinny, funny, hideously dull– it’s awful, just awful out there, this snow is a total piece of crap and you have to deal with it and that sucks.  It turns everybody into humans again, just regular humans with too much technology in their messenger bags and extremely cold noses, trying to get to work even though they don’t want to go to work, they wish there was another holiday coming up.

Anyway, hi mother nature.  It’s funny and interesting to see you again, here, in the Loop, where I thought we decided you don’t belong.  It will almost definitely not be funny at all when I am trying to get through you again tonight, but let me enjoy what I can while I can.

Breakfast of Champions

Today for breakfast:  Cookies and popcorn, wrapped in sandwich bags.  I let Amy circa roughly 1989 choose the menu, and boy does that girl have some great ideas.  That coupled with the hot coffee being warmed up by my coffee warmer should lead to plenty of joy and happiness for today.   I’m hoping.

Ok, I know I haven’t been blogging lately.  But give a girl a break.  Last month I bought and made about 50 Christmas presents, probably, and I attacked wedding planning with the force of the Abominable Snowman, the only guy who can reach the star on the top of the Christmas tree and simultaneously scare the crap out of everyone.  And this morning I lost my chapstick.  Alright?  So I don’t want to hear it. 

Wedding Planning.  So far, wedding planning has been sort of like the first day at a new job you really want.  You know.  You go in on that first day with your brain bursting with ideas about how it’s going to be and you’re so totally excited but then you get there and all your new clothes aren’t soft and worn yet so they’re kinda uncomfortable and the day goes. on. for. ever. and you realize you have no idea what you’re doing and you meet like a million new people and every one of them says something to you and you just keep nodding and smiling and forgetting names and making mistakes and everyone keeps correcting you, which is valid because you’re wrong, but annoying because how were you supposed to know in the first place?  You’re new for crying out loud!  And by the time you get home your head is so full of shiny new information you can’t really talk anymore so when people ask, “How was your first day?” you can’t even begin to describe so you’re just like, “It was… fine.  Great.  Good.  Good-ish?  It was great.  I think.”  Because, see, it really was great.  You’re just too tired and overwhelmed to realize that.  Anyway, that’s pretty much exactly how I feel about this last month of wedding stuff.  It’s been great, it really has.  Now excuse me while I eat a bunch of cookies and popcorn and veg out for like three days. 

Luckily, there’s lots of cookies and popcorn because Christmas has been going on all around me, the entire time.

There have also been cinnamon rolls and presents.

Amy circa 1989 would’ve been so proud of current, 2009 Amy.  Especially if she saw that she still had most if not all of her Mario 3 skillzzzzz.  Up top!  (Blog five)

Perhaps you’ve heard the news?  Joe bought Wayne and I a Wii!!!  For Christmas Engagement Wedding!!!  A Wii!!!  I just want to see those ii’s and !!’s next to each other again.  Wii!!!  It looks cool.  Anyway.  This week has been all about Animal Crossing.  My town is called Tropican!  I have pink hair in it!  I already have a fireplace in my house because it fell out of a tree!  We have some other games too.  We have a blast from the past called Star Tropics (Voo Doo lady says:  Under the southern cross, anything is possible.)  We have my old favorite and probably yours, Mario 3.  It took Wayne and me like, 15 lives to beat the big fish level in world 5 (Point of interest:  I’m the one who finally made it through, up top!).  That big fish is murder, let me tell you.  He’ll eat you alive, he doesn’t care. 

So if I’ve been a little overwhelmed the last few weeks, a little stressed or short, I apologize.  Know that the last few days of leftovers and video games have been like a balm for my chapped brain and I probably won’t be comparable to the Abominable Snowman forever.  I have other good stories too.  I finally got a bop-it, so I have something to take out during awkward social situations, like Lorelai and Rory.  I also have a new kite with a kite sleeve so I can keep it in the car without the string getting all tangled up in my fishing pole.  I have a reusable bag I might actually be able to use, since it fits in my purse.  Many people actually appeared to like the presents I homemade them, or at least, many people actually like me and are very kind about the fact that I made quite a few presents this year.  I got to spend time with most of the people I love a lot, especially my parents and my brother, and the people I didn’t spend time with I got to talk to or hear from, for the most part. 

And next month?  January o’ wedding planning?  Is going to be like the day when you realize you’re finally in the swing of things and you can totally find everything you need and you remember 70% of people’s names excluding the people whose hair and body types are the same and you were, in fact, the perfect person for this job all along.  Blog five!  I’m out.

A story about bling and trees and questions

Saturday Wayne asked me to marry him.  At Morton Arboretum.  In front of a whole lake full of fish (I’m pretty sure they were paying attention) and whole forest full of crunchy dead leaves (uninterested, primarily).  The sun was perfectly orangeish and 4:30ish.  I was wearing hiking boots and a sweatshirt.  I also had on my shades, so I know I looked cool (whew), and perhaps I should’ve suspected something because Wayne was wearing a nice sweater and he trimmed his beard.  So cute.  Right?  So just in case you haven’t heard from one of my ecstatic phone calls, from facebook, or from your local grapevine– I said yes!  We’re engaged!  The fish in the lake were all a-tizzy let me tell you.

So far there have been pros and cons.

Pro:  If I can learn to throw a punch with my left hand, it’s totally going to leave a mark.

Con:  I discovered Sunday morning that dancing around my bedroom to “Single Ladies” isn’t quite the same.  Especially the part when I lift my hand up, up in the club and there actually is a ring on it.  Crap.  Totally breaks the illusion.  I guess I have to find a new jam.

I know, what a bummer, right?  But don’t let that get you down.  Because, if you continue down my pro/con list, you’ll see:

Pro:  I’m so, so happy to be engaged to Wayne.  So happy.

Con:  It’s just the Beyonce thing.  That’s pretty much been it so far.

 

Jump, lady, jump

Wow, you guys (world) sure missed a lot of things in my life by not being me.  I mean.  I haven’t been blogging, so how could you possibly know?  It’s ok.  I’ll catch you up.

First of all, yes.  The title of this blog is none other than the best line of the Chicago Fire kid’s song.  You’re welcome.

Second, yes.  We went to the Mississippi River three weeks ago.  It was so much fun.

Third, yes.  I am absolutely going to dress up as Liz Lemon for Halloween.  You can’t even stop me.  I already have most of my costume (glasses, hair).  This is the most excited I’ve been about a thing since that first day of my first vacation when I decided to make pumpkin cookies and you can guess how excited that might have been.

Fourth, yes.  I have been wearing an orange scarf and breathing deep and noticing the leaves turn crazy yellow before they drop and get kicked around the sidewalks. 

I also burned the edges of my fingerless gloves last night like Blake told me to (W’s roommate) and it worked very well.  He said it would keep the edges from fraying.  It did, plus it involved burning, which is great.  Now the edges are crispy.  For real, I don’t know a better word to describe them than crispy.  And they are blue, which is wonderful, and the edges are crispy, and it was exactly the right kind of weather last night for burning gloves.

Fifth.  The candy I bought for Halloween at work has been a huge success.  My favorite thing these days is when someone looks inside the pumpkin and says, “Oooh, you have good candy up here!” as though all the other candy they’ve considered today is total crap.  Like all they’ve been offered so far is Bit-o-Honey and those bumpy red peanuts.  Although I like Bit-o-Honey, I tried a piece very recently.  It really does taste like a bit of honey.  So if the standard for good candy is “accurately named” and “pretty good” then it would win, hands-down, over Three Musketeers(only two ingredients) and Snickers (what).   I’m just saying.

And a thousand thousand slimy things lived on, and so did I.

That’s Coleridge.  I like it because it’s gross and the rhythm is perfect.  The line break is between things and lived.  If you’re wondering.  Anyway.  Upward, not northward!  Here we go.

I have a vacation coming up.  This is wonderful, wonderful, wonderful.  There is sure to be a leisurely perusal of books I’ve already read, piping hot paper cups of caramel apple cider, and blue jeans to throw on every morning.  That’s the dream, friends.  The dream!  Not to mention waking up at 8:00 if I’d like.

I had 8 vacation days saved up.  My boss called me in the middle of the day last week or the week before and was like, “Do you know how many vacation days you have?!  You’d better use them!  Take a long weekend!  Take three!  Geez!  What, do you hate life or something?”  I don’t, so I did.  I guess I just have a tendency to save things, I don’t know.  Anyway, I have three long weekends coming up, and a day for W’s birthday, and of course all the classic holidays that normal people have.  I am looking forward to it.  Yay!

So maybe I’ll have more things to blog about besides what kind/amount of coffee I’ve had and what the weather’s like.  We’ll see.

This particular vacation coming up this weekend should be convenient.  I have a real live short story due in my class on Monday.  So I’ll have some extra time to go out and work on it I think.  I need nine copies.    This is big for me, it means I might actually finish something besides a status update, and I will show it to people who don’t share DNA with me, and invite their comments on my sentences/close friends.  Huge, right? 

And Wayne took the day off Saturday so we could take a day trip.  We’re thinking of going to the Mississippi River.  To, you know, get scared about crossing it.  I’m sure you’ll get to see the pictures on facebook.  Although we haven’t done even a smidgen of planning yet, and don’t actually know if that’s a driveable distance for a day trip.  We’ll see.

Lastly, I have started too many books, so you know, just the right amount.  I just started Dead Souls in my daily lit emails.  That should be fun.  I am also reading Bright Lights, Big City which is about drugs so far.  I always get a little lost when the subject is drugs (How much would you suggest for a first time user?   We’ll take one.  Crack.  Rock?) but so far there is enough else going on that it’s engaging.  I am also in the middle of Wise Blood.  Wayne gave me a prettier copy, and now I really want to read it.  So I have an excuse to carry the pretty copy in my bag.  It actually kind of matches my bag.  That’s nice.  So I think I’ll focus on that for now.  That, and writing my short story.  Upward, not northward!  I know.  I said it twice.

And I’m back in the game!

When I woke up this morning, two things were immediately clear:  My sinuses, one.  And two, it’s kinda chilly out.  I can’t even describe my joy.  I bounded out of bed.  I was  a happy, slobbery puppy.  I got coffee.  I did a little boogie.  I applied eye makeup with ferociousness and without fear.   I only blew my nose once.  I only blew my nose once!

To be clear.  When the weather changes, I am finally able kick allergies in the butt and lock them up in the dark depths of my soul where they hang out with existentialism and fear of failure and leave me alone for most of the year.  This is literally the first morning in months I haven’t woken up sick.  You know, choking on snot with a massive over-the-counter-med dehydration headache.   I’m suprised I didn’t complain about it more.  Oh wait.  I did.

So anyway, here I am on the first morning of my new life, what am I going to do with it?  Well, for starters, I reeeally enjoyed my coffee.  Previously I’d been enjoying my coffee the way a person in a hospital enjoys an IV.  I mean, thank goodness it’s there.   But do I like like it?  Eh.  So this morning I broke free of all that and savored every delicious sip.  It helps when you can smell it, I think, which does require breathing through your nose.  I think it also helps a little if you don’t feel exactly like the undead. 

Another thing.  I bought some new fall shoes this weekend.  Merrills, of course, the only shoe I really like to walk in.  Only $34.00 at Marshalls!  What a find!  And while I was there I picked up an orange teapot because Marshalls is the best possible place to get crazy crap when you want it.  Oh beautiful orange teapot!  I just couldn’t put it down.  Right now I have it on the printer table in my bedroom and it’s just so pretty there.  Once I made friends with somebody because I opened the conversation with, “Do you like dishes?” And continuing on past the stare, ”Because I really love dishes and just look at this spoon.  And this saucer, oh my God!”   We were at some kind of meal I think, obviously.  Sometimes I suprise myself by playing my crazy off as charming, a knack I’m really lucky to have.  Anyway, what was I saying?  Oh yes.  I love my new teapot.

So I mean, obviously this kind of thing (orange teapot by my bed, new shoes, fresh cold air in my nostrils) is going to put me in a good mood.  And then there was Josh Ritter for tunes on the Fall Playlist.  And then there is the fact that I decided to re-read some of Gilead, which always makes me happy.  And the fact that I was in fact able to locate a decent pair of matching gloves in my closet this morning.

Friends.  Today is a new day.  I can breeeeeeathe!!!!!!

Fascinating… a wonderful book.

I’m reading a new book called Netherland, by Joseph O’Neill.  It’s been well reviewed, it’s popular, whatev.  Many people I know have already read it.  Well.  I guess I could just say Wayne’s already read it, but I think he told me someone else did too, possibly Bryan.  So far it’s about New York, cricket, relationships, and murder.  And so far I’m interested in 1 out of 4 of those things (go ahead, guess) but I am still really enjoying it.  And who knows?  Maybe life and books will make me a New York or cricket fan yet.

Confession:  My favorite thing about this book is a red circle sticker stuck to the front cover.  The sticker reads: “Fascinating… A wonderful book.” -President Barack Obama, Newsweek.  With President Barak Obama in large letters like that.

Ahh!  I love it.  I have hilarious plans for this sticker.  When I start my writing classes on Monday, I’m going to carefully unstick it from Netherland and stick it to the front of my writing notebook.  Ha ha ha.  Did I not tell you my plans were hilarious?  All I can even do is hope that someone notices it.  I’m laughing just thinking of that moment.

One by one I am crossing things off my Fall to-do list.  For instance, I bought a giant red bag.  I love it.  It’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a bag, including but not limited to being red.  I’ve also started carrying around skinny markers, so that instead of writing in black I have my choice of colors.  If you’ve ever been to my bible study, you know how important that is to me because I’m always passing out markers when I want people to write something.  Also because a tiny part of me has never stopped being 10 years old.  It’s probably the part that is so amused by the Barak Obama sticker.

Fall, I’d like you to meet Amy. Amy, Fall.

At first I thought fall wasn’t really coming because it was too early.  Then Labor Day weekend happened and I guess it’s true.  I mean, I can’t wear my white slacks anymore, although I never really wear white slacks.  Today I am wearing the white shirt my grandma got me (thanks grandma!) but I don’t think that counts.  Do shirts count?  All I know is this one’s cute and new and I’m wearing it.

So okay.  I could lament the Summer That Never Seemed to Happen, and the fact that my allergies kicked in July 1 instead of the usual August 29 rendering summer almost completely ineffectual, and the fact that I love summer but I didn’t do anything really summery (popsicles, reading outside) because I didn’t make it a priority,  or.  I could focus on the new season and not let this one go to waste.  It may seem like I’m choosing the former, but I’m trying to choose the latter.  Well.  I’m going to choose it really soon.  Right after this paragraph.

I started by painting my nails last night.  Red, my color for fall. 

I’ve got a whole list of stuff like that.  So it’s going to be great.

And, guess what!  I made a bracelet!  I’ve been wearing it for two days and it’s not broken or anything!  It’s black and silver, beads my mom picked out, actually, and it’s super cute.  It has a real clasp and everything.  I have two sets of earrings in the works, too, I just couldn’t finish them on time Saturday.  Maybe I’ll finish them tonight.  Anyway, I made jewelry with my mom (I told you I needed her to help) and she admitted it was hard, but we still figured it out.  I’m very proud of us and you should be too! 

Ugh.  My allergies are making any further writing unthinkable right now, so I’ll end here.  I’ll update more on my kick!  ass!  fall!  really soon.

Go visit a farmer, or a poet, someone who appreciates you, you stupid rain

It is raining ah. gain.  How can that even be?  Is there really that much available water in the sky?  Really?  Really?

I am sick of walking in the rain.  I am sick of babysitting my wet umbrella on the El so it doesn’t get too close to some other innocent rain victim.  I am sick of rain.  Summer wasn’t even good enough to pay for this.  I’m not like, “At least it was a beautiful summer,” because it wasn’t really.  Actually, it rained 4th of July weekend.  And that’s all I remember, that and eating Italian ice, because that’s the only day I had off work.  So there, rain, thanks a lot.

If I want to get gratitude-y, though, here’s something: I wore my new jacket today!  For my birthday, among other things (because my mom is wonderful) I got an adorable denim blazer jacket from Ann Taylor Loft.  Picture Rory Gilmore 6th season, when she’s living in the pool house and hanging out with Logan a lot.  So, since I got it for my birthday I obviously have not been able to wear it much because despite what I wrote above, it has been somewhat summery and OK, OK, it’s been hot out, so no jackets.  And today I get to wear my jacket!  And I look pretty cute, so, there.  Thanks rain for your contribution to my outfit today.

Mary Lee started school this week, and although that means a myriad of things for her,  it means one very special thing for me:  Coffee o’mornings.  When there are two people drinking coffee, it just makes sense to set the coffeemaker.  When it is one person, not so much.  So there goes my VIA summer.  Fall is really going to happen.  I’m wearing this jacket, it’s raining again. 

I guess fall is really beautiful, who needs summer anyway.  There are plenty of nice days coming up.  I’m– sure of it.